Ha! Made ya look.
Hope this doesn't sound 2 silly or self-centered, but how bout Blogger's new "Stats" function, eh?
(I mean, it IS new, isn't it? I haven't been using this system 4 a year & just didn't SEE it up til last week, right? Have my eyes really gotten THAT bad?)
Anyway, something NEW 2 play with, Ghod help me. & what AMAZING (frankly unbelievable) statistical information is available right at my fingertips! (No, this is not going to be a commercial 4 Blogger/Google/whoever. Tho I'm sure they must B nice folks....)
4 instance: I'm finding it pretty hard 2 Blieve that a dozen people viewed my last post within the 1st 24 hrs after I posted it. Or that 20 people viewed this blog on the same day last week. C'mon -- there's only about 12 people in the world who know I write a blog ... sometimes. I don't even KNOW 20 people.
I'm also having a hard time Blieving that people in Ghana & Bolivia R viewing this blog. (& Ghod knows what they must think of it.)
& as 4 those folks who stumbled over the Back-Up Plan by doing a blog search -- what the Hell were they looking for?
& if all these people R allegedly out there viewing this stuff -- why the hell Rn't they commenting?
C'mon, don't B shy, I don't bite. If you're in Bolivia & you wondered who else in the world had actually heard the Raiders' 1972 non-hit "Country Wine," go ahead & drop me a line. It would actually be really cool 2 hear from you. If you're really out there. Which I'm not totally convinced about....
Maybe these visits & views R just a random thing -- Do people really do nothing but sit at home & surf the Net 24/7? & do they get PAID 4 it? & how would I go about getting a job like that? Anybody out there who can give me details -- & if there's actual $$$ involved -- fill me in & I'll split the proceeds with you (90/10, of course)....
Wow, maybe I can start attracting more attention by posting stuff with outrageous titles like the 1 above ... or how about "500 Nymphos and a Mule"! That should grab a lotta viewers. Or maybe "Make your penis 6 times bigger -- RIGHT NOW!" ... No, that 1's 2 common already.... Oh, I know -- "Never pay taxes again!!!" That's it.
All I gotta do then is sit back & C how many "hits" I get. (That IS what they're called, isn't it?) Can't wait....
But don't think this means the Back-Up Plan is gonna "go commercial." Oh no, absolutely not. I don't wanna B like every other blog out there, writing about Lady Gaga and the Jonas Brothers, or whether Lindsay Lohan's back in jail again. Hell no. I'd rather talk about music I was too stupid 2 appreciate 40 years ago -- or last week.
Besides, if I really wanted 2 max-out my readership, I'd probly havta start writing in Real English....
(This post brought to you by Blogger, dedicated to letting idiots express themselves worldwide -- whether anybody reads them or not....)