My brother from another mother

I have a step-brother named Jay who lives in Michigan, my Dad's son from a previous marriage. I assume he's still alive -- a Google search of his name brings up a court appearance a year ago, where he got fined $1,000 & spent a day in jail 4 what sounds like a domestic violence incident. That sounds like him, & the age & location is right.
My Dad thot he might be dead, or in prison. Neither of us know 4 sure. I don't really WANT 2 know Bcos it would take me back 2 somewhere I don't want 2 be. I haven't heard from Jay in almost 35 years.
He lived with me & my family 4 almost 9 months back in 1974-75, when I was 15 years old. He taught me a lot when I was at an impressionable age -- most of it bad. I'm sure my parents wouldn't be suprised 2 learn that the 1st few times I smoked pot it was with Jay, under pressure, surrounded by people I didn't know & didn't feel comfortable with, & all it did was give me a headache & make the power-line poles along the side of the road come at me in slow motion during the ride home.
But despite the ugly temper he got from my Dad & the fact that he got all the girls, there were times when Jay was actually fun 2 hang around with. He was a big music fan 2 -- but it had 2 B the right KIND of music, stuff he could get stoned 2, mostly: Black Sabbath's 1st, Rare Earth's ONE WORLD, Foghat's 1st, Bob Dylan's BLOOD ON THE TRACKS, Pink Floyd's A NICE PAIR -- most of these on bootlegged 8-track tapes. (Remember 8-tracks? Remember cheapo bootleg 8-tracks? You could get them at any convenience store for awhile....)
He had pretty good taste in cars, 2. Ghod knows I had no objection 2 Jay picking me up from highschool in a '62 Impala Super Sport with big wide tires on the back & the radio blaring. It sure beat walkin'.
Later he got this huge old "ticket-me red" Dodge panel van that dated back 2 about 1952 & got about 3 miles 2 the gallon. You could sleep in the back, there was MILES of space back there. But there was NO insulation in there, it was just a bare metal shell with a coupla benches along the walls, & it got COLD in there at night. ...& when the local cops 1st saw the van, the 1st thing they did was pull my brother over....
The girls loved him. With his long dark hair & dark complexion & big nose, & a pack of cigarettes rolled up in his short-sleeve shirt (at age 17) -- he looked like a hood. He had no trouble attracting attention & getting dates. While I was lucky if I could squeak out 2 words 2 any attractive girl my age. I could see how it was gonna be real quick-like. We still had some good times, tho we were very diffrent people. I was the obnoxious, innocent, worthless Little Brother. The girls hated me -- unless I could pass on a message 2 have Jay call them.
I was pretty innocent when Jay came along, & somehow stayed that way 4 a coupla more years. But he taught me a lot thru example, most of it bad: How to treat women badly, how to lie & take advantage, how 2 steal. When we were just hangin' out & workin' on his car & staying close 2 home, or going out 2 the Meridian Drive-In 4 a night of movies with the girls, it was all good fun.
But he dropped outta highschool, he couldn't hold a job, he'd clash with bosses. Money was always tight, & he couldn't leave the house without gas money, & with no job there was no gas money. So we started stealing gas. In the late summer we'd just cruise around neighborhoods at night & take gas cans outta open garages or outta the backs of boats.
This seemed pretty ballsy 2 me, the few times I did it or helped Jay do it. 1nce I remember grabbing a full gas can outta some1's garage & breaking in2 snorting laffter as I walked down the street carrying the can -- I couldn't believe innocent little law-abiding ME was doing this. & then Jay ordered me in2 the car Bcos the light had come on in the garage behind me....
The group of girls we hung-out with -- all Jay fans, of course -- often coughed-up gas money or helped scrounge 4 gas cans, just 2 have his company, just 2 get outta the house & have something 2 do.
We never got caught. It was a long time ago, & I'm pretty sure the statute of limitations has run out on this stuff by now.
But Jay started staying away from home more -- weeks went by when my folks didn't know where he was. I assumed he was hanging out & getting high with his friends whose names I'd never bothered 2 learn. & meanwhile, things escalated. Jay came back 2 the house when no1 was home, & took money. Much later I learned he'd broken in2 the home of 1 of our friends & taken anything he thot he might be able 2 pawn-off.
When Jay crashed his car thru a big cube-shaped electrical junction box, the power company called my Dad, because Jay was still a juvenile. The damage was estimated at a couple thousand dollars. & when Jay came home the next day, my Dad THREW him up against the outside wall of the trailer we were living in & SCREAMED at him.... & Jay went back 2 Michigan the next day.
My Dad & I don't talk about Jay much. Last summer Dad said he'd heard Jay had done some prison time, then after he got out he seemedta B heading in a good direction when he got in2 an ugly motorcycle accident that supposedly burned most of his face off. He hadta have plastic surgery & now apparently looks completely diffrent.
Why am I telling you all this? Not sure. I think about my teen years a lot, but I don't think of this period 2 much, cos I did a lot of stupid things. I was an idiot. A 15-year-old who thot he knew everything -- don't they all?
What outrageously stupid things did YOU do while growing up?

400!?

Don't know if this means anything 2 any1 other than me, but if you count the 225+ posts I did at my old dead website + the 175 or so I've done here (a couple have been deleted along the way), that makes just over 400 ... in a little over 2 years.
I don't believe it. I thot I was pretty-well written-out last summer, that I didn't have a whole lot left. But somehow stuff keeps bubbling up....
If I hadn't been down 4 2 months awhile back with no computer, I mighta gotten here even sooner. This is still just as much fun 4 me as it ever was, & sometimes even more compulsive. At the end of some posts I've been tempted 2 add "Powered by Caffeine" rather than "Powered by Blogger" or whatever -- this is possibly 1 of them....
Anyway, I hope some of you out there at least laugh 1nce in awhile when you read this stuff, or think of some piece of music you haven't heard in 30 years. If any of that happens, I've done something worthwhile.
My thanx 2 the folks who read & comment here regularly -- especially Rastro & Crabby, & Drew & Gardenhead & Adam & Perplexio & the few others who comment now & then. You guys keep me going.
& apparently SOMEone else is looking at this stuff: Blogger claims I'm getting 800+ pageviews ("hits"?) per month lately, & the #'s keep going up -- if you can believe Blogger. Not sure if I do. Apparently folks from all over the planet stumble in here by accident. I'm really big in Bolivia & Latvia. Ghod knows what they must think....
OK: If you're crouched in a yurt out on the Mongolian steppe somewhere & you ended up HERE somehow, will ya 4 Chrissakes COMMENT & let me know what led you here, what you think, etc? It's making me crazy....
In the future I hope 2 drag-in more nostalgia, more music writing, more odd experiences from my Air Force & newspaper-reporting career, more embarrassing personal stuff, moremoremore. Maybe I'll do some more rough drafts 4 a critical guide 2 Strange Music, a book I've wanted 2 write 4 more than 20 years. I'll keep going as long as the World's Smallest Laptop holds out.
4 now, I'd just like 2 thank the Academy & every1 I've ever met in my entire life....
Thanx 2 my son ADD who set-up my 1st website & gave me the best Xmas present I've ever had, the gift that keeps on giving. Thanx 2 Mark Prindle, who immediately & without hesitation started pointing people in my direction; & 2 Don Ignacio, who dived in soon afterward; & 2 Drew, who's sent me more visitors lately than any1 else.
Thanx 2 Gardenhead, who encouraged me when things got dark; & 2 Mary, who got me 2 TALK 2 somebody when things got REALLY dark -- I think she probably still reads this stuff & might be wondering what I'm thinking these days: I don't know, sweetie. Did I ever?
I remain amazed by what this Internet can do: When I posted that review of Andrew Foster Altschul's DEUS EX MACHINA yesterday, within 30 minutes after it was up somebody found the post thru a Google search. Amazing. It's the closest thing 2 James Blish & Ursula K. LeGuin's instant communication. Or as close as I want 2 get, anyway....
& I'm still surprised by how much this has come 2 mean 2 me. This right here is how I deal with the world, how I relax, un-stress, de-compress. Writing about music & books is WAY easier than trying 2 figure out why there was a double-fatality shooting in the Wal-Mart parking lot a mile down the road from my house. & a helluva lot more comforting. If I were 2 lose this, I'd feel like I'd had something amputated.
Hope it's working 4 you, 2. Thanx 4 reading....

Vacation, all I ever wanted....

Greetings. Took a week-long vacation back home to Idaho. Went to see my Dad and Sister. Tracked-down 1 old friend & tried to find more; at 1 point I wished I'd kept in touch with more old friends from highschool so I'd have more folks to track down....
But I went mainly to see my Dad & get a break from work, maybe get back in touch with myself again. I've been way too grumpy & sad for way too long.
Idaho was very different. The pace there was MUCH slower. For a week I didn't hear people yelling, didn't see folks stressing-out, nobody tried to run over me on the road, nobody yelled obscenities at me for driving too slow -- nobody seemed to be in too much of a hurry. & I didn't see any weirdos freaking-out in public.
It was ... pretty great.
Coupla minor drawbacks: I was so far out in the sticks that I couldn't get cellphone service -- so far out the World's Smallest Laptop couldn't suck-up enuf signals to receive or transmit, tho I tried.
I was a little different, too. I didn't drink as much coffee. Didn't need it. I woke up before noon, regularly -- as early as 7 am, some days -- got up just because the sun was out & it was a beautiful morning. Of course on vacation you can do stuff like that.
The air was different there too -- way lighter & less humid than here in Western Washington. Tho it got hot -- up into the mid-90's -- the dryness of the air made it feel maybe 10 degrees cooler than the same temps here. Course when it got over 100, that was hot enuf for anyone....
It was nice to see the family, & my 1st day back I got a little reminder of what I've missed in my nearly 30 years away from home -- I was introduced to an adorable little 4-year-old girl who is 1 of my nieces, & I was intro'd to her as her "Great Uncle." I still can't keep track of who my sister's kids are married to. I've missed out on a LOT.
Spent a lotta time just driving around the Boise area -- there's a lot of nostalgia there for me. Wish I'd had time to do more. Didn't find a single decent used bookstore that was open -- tho I drove by several that had closed. Didn't even bother trying used record stores -- was afraid of what I might find. But neither of those things were why I went.
Can't comment on Idaho radio because I hardly listened to any: When I was driving thru my old hometown I wanted to be IN IT, not distracted. Can talk a little about radio on the drive there & back: There's a rather good oldies station around Stanfield & Hermiston, Oregon, that specializes in '60s & '70s hits -- I hadn't heard Paul Revere & the Raiders' "Him or Me -- What's it Gonna Be?" in awhile. But the station faded out as soon as I got into Oregon's Blue Mountains.
The only other thing I can tell you is that Eastern Oregon has a few too many radio stations broadcasting about the wonders of Jeezus & Ghod 24/7 -- I remember making the same trip back in '79 & coming over a hill near Baker, Ore., only to be suddenly blasted by the Voice Of Ghod announcing the adventures of "God's Own Agriculturalist -- George Washington Carver!!!!" Their programming hasn't changed much....
Perhaps this weirdness is because there's a lotta wide-open spaces in Eastern Oregon, Eastern Washington & lots of Idaho & Wyoming -- there's a stark beauty there, but there's also MILES of Nothing. That's why many people fly over that part of the country rather than drive it. But I hate to fly....
I took tons of CDs with me for the trip, then ended up not playing most of them. Played most of Camel's ECHOES best-of ("Never Let Go," "Rhayader," "Unevensong," "Breathless," "Echoes," "Drafted," "Sasquatch," "West Berlin," "Mother Road"), & started on Caravan's CANTERBURY TALES best-of ("Place of My Own," "And I Wish I Were Stoned," "Golf Girl," "Nine Feet Underground," "The World is Yours," "Songs and Signs") -- but when I narrowly avoided wrecking the rental car by trying to dodge around a shredded tire in the middle of the freeway, I decided 2 put the CDs away & focus on what was in front of me ... at least for the next hundred miles or so. & I never got back to them....
I didn't take anything to read with me. While there I wanted to DO & BE -- experience, not try to get away.
The only thing wrong with the break -- of course -- was that it wasn't any longer. Nothing here changed while I was gone.
There are a FEW jobs in Idaho, if you want to work for $7.52/hour, which I don't. But I liked the slower pace, after years of stressing out. & the sunshine & clear skies, long as it didn't get TOO hot. & the closeness of family, even if I haven't seen most of them in years. & being surrounded by a place I know very well. & I have a few friends there.
I needed the break, tho coming back home felt pretty good too. Tho mosta those good feelings were gone by 11 pm on my 1st nite back to work. Since then I've shredded the fanbelt on my truck, so I'm now walking the mile to & from work -- which actually hasn't been that bad. Sort of a nice break, & the exercise is probably better for me than I wanna admit. Long as no passing cars try to run over me during my walk home at 1 am....
...I'd like to get back to blogging here. There are lots of things I'd still like to write about, lotsa great music & books I'd like to turn y'all on to. But I needed the break. Most of my reading experiences lately have been disappointing. & except for the little bit of music I listened to during the trip, I don't think I've played any music in the house since about April -- which shoulda been a sign to me that something was wrong....
I hope to get back to this, I hope to write more in general, perhaps even try to push on with that rock-group novel. As I was reminded while on vacation, I'm 50 ... so I'd better get on with it. Even if my health was perfect I couldn't expect to have 50 more years left. Maybe 20? So I've wasted too much time already. But I already knew that.
Can't promise I'm gonna be back to my old productive self, but I am feeling a LITTLE better. If anyone has an idea about how I can take a year off & still get paid, please let me know....